Sitting outside in the woods in my tiny little garden on a spring morning, listening to nothing but the sound of the birds, just me and God…one of my favorite ways to spend my time as a teen growing up. Unusual, perhaps, but beautiful. Beautiful and perfect.
I’m pretty introverted, but at the same time I’m not afraid to get out and do something different. I don’t want a normal life. I want to make a difference in the world for the better. It took me awhile to reach that point, but I’m here.
Feel free to laugh at this–I laugh at myself for it sometimes–but growing up I’ve always been intrigued by nuns and how they live. Now, I’m not Catholic, but just the simple way of life they have, with a humility and love seen in what doesn’t seem like could be much more of a sacrifice of their life, somehow seems so peaceful and perfect to me.
For awhile I pretty much wanted something not too far different…to be out of this world as possible. Get away—live in the middle of nowhere if need be. When I looked at the world around me, I didn’t like what I saw. I didn’t want to have anything to do with it.
When I was around 20 years old, God placed right in front of me something that changed everything.
Without even looking for any job of the kind, I was asked to be a personal care attendant for a special needs child. I took the job, started working within three days, and I began to see things I had been so blind to before. I began to realize that around the world there are thousands and thousands who are hurting—spiritually and physically.
God opened my eyes to see more clearly that He wants more from us than just a relationship with Him. While our relationship with Him should come first, He also wants us to be sharing His love with others in a tangible way. We were meant to make a difference in this world. We all have a calling. I realized how selfish my way of thinking had been, and He slowly but surely has continued to help me focus on Him in a way that opens my eyes to do what He has called me to do.
I’ve got a long way to go, but hey, that’s life! ;D
Psalms of the Heart 